My neighbor took down my Gladston flag (which you can’t buy on eBay anymore), and also peeled the NRA sticker off my front window, so . . . . I disconnected my home alarm system and quit the candy-ass Neighborhood Watch.
I bought two Pakistani flags and put one at each corner of the front yard. Then I purchased the black flag of ISIS (which you can buy on eBay) and ran it up the flag pole.
Now the local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Secret Service, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service, and other agencies are watching my house 24/7. I’ve never felt safer, and I’m saving $69.95 a month that ADT used to charge me.
Plus, I bought burkas for my wife and me to wear when we shop or travel. Everyone moves out of the way, and security can’t pat us down. If they ask if I’m a male wearing a burka, I just say I’m feeling like a woman today! There’s as many restrooms available now!
Awesome. Hot Damn! Safe at last!
Ain’t America great or what?
Got me for a second or two....but sadly far too true.
HAHA!! Love it!